Saturday, January 14, 2012

Do I Really Miss Her?

 
I have a story in here lamenting the loss 16 years ago of the woman I was sure I was destined to spend the rest of my life. Life doesn't always work out as planned And it seems the farther I get away from the day we separated, the less I think of her. Yet still, a few times a year I filled with most intense longing for her. It's as if I can feel her presence very near. I almost expect to see her around every street corner or hear from her when I answer the phone. God, I love her still after all this time. Yet do I really love her, or am simply in love with my memories of her? Are the emotions which ebb and flow a defense mechanism not only against my love challenged marriage, but the fact I have never been able to experience the love I had for her with anyone else? Where she is today, I hope she is happy. I also hope that from time to time to she pauses to remember me kindly. I am sure her and I will meet again after we pass from this world to the next. I am in no rush. But I know she was the love of my life, and I will never love anyone again the way that I love her.

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